Guest BlogThe Kevin Jenne is an endangered species. He can be found at parties mixing a mean gin & tonic and speak about the incessant need for artistic freedom.
Your guide to spotting a wild Jenne:
-He will be holding a cocktail.
-Sooner or later, the word “contemporary artistic freedom” will come into the conversation.
-He will want you to pose with a saxophone.
-Can be spotted in dumpsters around near frame shops.
-Can be seen feeding at the local Indian food joint, or Cosmos.
-Will be sporting a nice vest.
-Will be looking bewildered at wildflowers.
-Will ask for not so spare change.
-Will refer to nature as the great painting.
-Will make you smell his elbow.
-Will lose your luggage in a creative way.
-Will stare at shoes for longer than is comfortable.
-Can leap tall blades of grass in two or three bounds.
Caution: Do not feed.The way to catch a wild Jenne is to bait an empty canvas with a “concept”.
The wild Jenne stays indoors most of the time and enjoys picture books.
He likes to color outside the lines to encourage artistic freedom.
He will not endorse free donkeys for the homeless.
He has yet to eat a whole spider.
He has once thought of becoming a ballroom dancer coach.
He once thought love was a four letter word, multiplied by two, but divided by the sum of the root of 16 divided by two. He always did like to complicate things.
He once left a gopher for dead, but was pleasantly surprised by it’s outburst of laughter after a funny knock knock joke.
He once played chess with a cricket and lost miserably. He proceeded to squish his opponent.
He once loved the sound of children laughing, but now prefers Metallica.
He once believed he could fly, but sadly, he had no in-flight peanuts.
His major claim to fame was pealing a banana with his toes.
He can make a Venetian blind, by poking one in the eye.
He claims to have invented the question mark.
He no longer speaks to badgers. The last conversation was traumatic.
His dogma got run over by his Karma.
He thinks TV stands for Telepathic Virus.
He punched out Bob Ross in a bar fight over tree shading.
He last ate a wood chip over 2 years ago, but it is a contact battle of wills.
He used to paint by numbers, but now only paints by prime numbers.
He hates to admit his love of Elvis on Velvet.
He will paint for food, but only served by an ugly waitress. (Murray’s in TMR)
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